Category: General

My Father-in-Law, Congressman David S. King, D. Utah said often, “The hardest but best lessons I ever learned came when I failed miserably.” These lessons that are gotten under the worst of situations and through the hardest experiences —-never leave us and are forever drawn upon to guide us.

On a practical note, when we are training and things are either super boring or we are distracted by other things that are bugging us, we have to reach deep. Block out the badness until we finish and then go take care of the personal business. Then, there are other times when we get injured (arm, leg, shoulder, hips, knee) somewhere and life in the gym becomes much different for awhile. The pain that we have to fight through is often “deafening” and discouraging. I have a basic principle that I use because I am notorious for “over training” and I’m always in danger of a major injury. I use the mantras, “Do the work!” as I train. and then if I get injured, I plug in the next mantra, “Work Around it!” Emotional distraction or injury requires us to find another way to get the job done without stopping the progress. Let me reiterate, that these moments or times of great pain and discouragement teach us tons about ourselves and how to be better despite the pain.

Stay the course no matter what. But! Do take the time to learn from the harshness that life will deal to us. It doesn’t matter if the pain we go through is fair or not. What matters is that we learn how to win despite the pain. It’s also interesting that there are particular challenges involving pain that can only teach us what we need to know. For instance. If our coach has been telling us to do things a certain way, or at a particular time, or for a certain number of repetitions and we ignore the coach we suffer a set back of epic proportions—-We finally get the message. The suffering we caused ourselves is more than we can handle. We change. We progress. We please our coach and ourselves. We win.

In closing: I have a T-Shirt from Branch Warren that says, “Suffering Leads to Greatness!” In summary, this is the essence of learning our BEST LESSONS through pain……See all of you in the crucible of pain that teaches….

This is an indictment that all of us should integrate and allow it to penetrate all the way down to our bones. After we have cleared the gang of opposition that always presents itself to us when we want to accomplish a goal, there are a precious few of our friends, family, and associates that remain. This group believes in us. They go so far as to say it out loud and to tell us to our faces that they want us to do well and that they are pulling for us.

This group of people that truly believe in us demands that we crank up our dedication and our efforts. These friends deserve to be shown that their belief in is not wasted. They need to know that you are living up to your own expectations which serves as a great foundation for our fans to continue investing in their support for our endeavor.

I always point out the various bands and groups that perform in front of thousands of their faithful fans and how they dress like slovenly, dirty, bums as they play the best music in the world. To me these self absorbed little punks display the greatest disdain for the public that pays their salaries. It’s total disrespect for the people that truly love their music. The paying public deserves to be counted as worthy and appreciated. Nobody is arguing that they are bad musicians. We just think they need to act like professionals

When it comes to us, we have to have a sense honor and respect for all those that have invested themselves in our support. Demonstrate to them that they are important and that we truly care about making them happy since they have become our partners in success.

Bottom Line: We dare not insult those that believe in us by not dedicating ourselves to winning. They have given of themselves and we dare not let our dedication decrease. We may never get this sort of personal endorsement back if we denigrate our closest fans belief in us. They deserve our best so never give it away…..This is a very hard life lesson—so let’s learn it well….

Someone has said, “You begin where you are.” Very pithy but it’s true….In a mathematical sense a VECTOR has Magnitude and Direction. But, in order to have a VECTOR there has to be a starting point. Basic to all experience in our world is that we have to start somewhere and we have to have a plan to get somewhere else. In each of our worlds there is a desire to be successful or accomplished at something. So, we take stock of who we are, what or who we want to become, and where these things are located. We lay out the plan to move toward our own personal definition/description of success. We begin the journey. Simple enough.

The part that we rarely prepare for or even anticipate is the opinions of others about our definition of success. As soon as we begin talking about our plans, the posse of naysayers and doubters always appears. All of them want a piece of our vision to dismantle, to tear up, to ridicule and to destroy. This is a reality of the world that we do not address nor do we have the tools to combat and turn back. Without a proper internal and personal response we are doomed to believe the mob and tear up our dream. But, if we believe in what we want then we will devise a way to win despite the self-appointed opposition.

The TEST for us is whether we can side step the verbal barbs of doubt and ridicule to continue on toward the goal and the win. I would say that 90% of all announcements to others about our plans to win are met with scorn with resultant discouragement.

Do you remember when you first decided to compete on stage as a bodybuilder? WOW! You had just as well told your closest (alleged) friends that you were going to drive a VW to the Austrian Alps from Colorado, Ocean not withstanding. The chuckling, the dramatic physical taunting (Archer Pose) was unending. But, we somehow, pushed ahead out of their sight and began the journey.

The TEST is whether you really believe that you can win despite all the opposition. Herein lies the secret of winning. Discipline does not care whether you are discouraged, whether you are tired, whether you don’t feel like doing it…..You do it anyway. To get over the doubts of others, and the TESTING we have to shut off all feelings and do the work no matter what.

Bottom Line: If you want to win, you have to prepare to win and be willing to withstand doubt and to endure the testing that will inevitably come. This is our challenge: We have to overcome doubt and testing to have that which we seek!

There are times in our lives when we wish things were different—-somehow. Things are either so boring and predictable that motivation has taken a vacation or things are soooo cataclysmically bad that the pain and suffering has to go away or we just know we will die. In either case we have decided to separate ourselves from the humdrum or the pain and be better.

Change is hard! The first thing we have to do is decide what we want to change to. Basic underpinning philosophy is that no matter where we are, change is absolutely necessary if we are to progress and move on to be a winner. I hate it when I finally realize that what I am doing is no longer working. But, it’s here that I scan the horizon for that new “thing’ that will get me to where I want to go. Again! Change is hard. We get so accustomed to doing something suboptimally ore badly that we cannot imagine doing it differently. Take for instance training. Somebody taught us a particular methodology and for a long time it worked. Now, however, it has become boring and the gains are not coming quite so fast.

First step is to decide that a change is needed. Get alone like you did in the beginning and come to the realization that nothing good is going to occur unless we make a switch. Secondly, we have to devise a new way of doing things. We read, we talk to training partners, our coach, other competitors and we arrange a new path forward based on tons of thinking and research. Thirdly, we attack our new regimen with a vengeance! Push, Pull, Lift, and suffer the many new changes that have to be put into place. Do not look back….The old way is gone forever. This new road is your way of showing others and yourself that we have the “STRENGTH” to change when our reality was not good and it was going nowhere fast.

Lastly, know that your change is the bedrock that you will build a much more secure and happier future. This change will reinforce in you that we are capable of doing things differently when chage is required.

Bottom Line: Change is hard. But by sheer force of character, will, and personal strength we can win. We love a routine but there will come a time when our old routine will never serve us well again. Reach deep and apply the inner strength needed to change. This is our calling to be better and to win

There are times when we feel like tomorrow will never come. I/we feel stuck in the moment and there just is not a clear path forward. Regretfully, all of us tend to live down to this mindset rather than rise above it. The response for most of us is short lived but it still happens. We mope around, mad at the world, believing we are defeated etc. What a sucky place to be. But, there is another way to see ourselves and it takes a little effort to get beyond the current self-annihilation perspective. Let me explain the obvious.

First, especially if you are a bodybuilder, we understand intuitively and experientially, that there are days and sometimes (rarely) weeks where nothing goes right. An injury, a relationship that goes out the window, people who say that they are our friends begin to say bad things about us. A death in the family, a sick child, a personal spiritual crisis. All of these things take their toll on our self-confidence and they tend to derail us, our direction, and our forward movement. Again, these things suck big time. I don’t have a “quick fix” for any of this stuff, but in order to get to our “FINAL DESTINATION” which we alone define, we have to get over the hump.’

For me personally, I try not to define myself by today’s standards or problems. I try to lift up my mind high enough to remember who I am and where I’m going. This effort is Herculean but it is the only remedy for self doubt and a resulting poor self image. Sadly, as we go through these times of darkness others begin to see the downward spiral. Ouch! Let’s not belabor all this.

It is here that we have to remember a few things: 1.). Why you started 2.) What it’s taken to get to where you are 3.) What the plan has been to get to our “FINAL DESTINATION” 4.) Remember where you want to go. Starkly, in writing if necessary, state our own definition of our “FINAL DESTINATION.”

Lastly, never let anybody else define our “FINAL DESTINATION” by where we are at the moment. This is OUR BUSINESS and it is sacred work. Guard your heart with all diligence and let nobody define you by where you are this moment. Bodybuilders are special because we express the journey in ways nobody else will ever understand. Keep at it! I’ll see your at “YOUR FINAL DESTINATION!”-–Call me when you arrive…..LOL

Everybody I’ve ever known has been put onto our backs violently. The mechanism of injury can be verbal, emotional, psychological, or physical. It hurts, it’s shocking, and sometimes surprising and humiliating. it just doesn’t matter how we got there. What matters is what we do from that point forward. Simply put, we can lay there and let the bad stuff pour over us or we can roll over, get first to our knees, then to one leg and then push ourselves to a standing position. It’s a simple choice but it still has to be made. What we choose to do will determine the next immediate events and it will also define us for a long time to come. Choose wisely!

I can recall getting into a fight when I was really young. I have a big ego and big mouth and a small body. Bad combination for me. I lipped off and this guy who was 2 years older than me proceeded to pound me. The one thing he didn’t count on was my courage/stupidity. Each time he had me beaten and stood up after pummeling me I would stand up and scream at him and call him a dirty name. He would repeat the process of nearly killing me. One time he stopped hitting me and said out loud, “I’m going to kill him!” As soon as he walked away I stood up and again insulted him. This happened repeatedly until he was worn out from kicking my ass. Lesson for me! 1.) I can take it. 2.) #1 is irrelevant if you’re being killed by your own idiocy. 3.) I proved to myself I could hobble 6 blocks home and collapse on my living room floor in front of my poor mother. Thus, proving she truly had raised a masochistic idiot for a son.

Each of us has to decide what to do when your are beaten or whether there is a chance to recover and get back into the fight. I would like to think that staying on the mat is my last choice. If I stay on the mat it’s because I am destroyed and there is no comeback. BUT! if there is any fight left in me this enemy is going to pay big time because he neglected to kill me.

In bodybuilding, there are times when we approach the stage and we get a chance to take stock of our competition and it’s a bit daunting. Great athletes and then there’s me. We can play “not to lose’ ore we can dig deep and make the “beautiful people” uncomfortable……This game is not over just because we are intimidated. We have to turn the corner and make this night memorable because you’re ready and because it belongs to you.

Bottom Line: Either get used to being kicked around or expectantly deliver the knock out blow to any who would hurt you or defeat you. GET UP! FOCUS! FIND THE TARGET! ATTACK!

THE END IS OFTEN A CHOICE NOT A CONSEQUENCE!

A great friend and colleague of mine told me his story about coming from a communist country, going to a surgery residency and succeeding. He said that in 1952 he was a North Korean citizen and medical student. When the Korean War broke out he was working in a hospital and out of nowhere soldiers appeared on the floor where he and many of his colleagues were taking care of patients. They were all rounded up by the North Korean soldiers. For the next several months the medical staff including physicians and nurses were forced to care for sick and wounded North Korean Communist soldiers. They worked in the open with very few instruments, medicines, sterile supplies or even blankets for the themselves or the wounded. Sometimes they worked in tents and this was considered a luxury.

After many months they plotted an escape and during one of the nights several physicians and nurses escaped and made their way south. They traveled by night and slept by day wherever they found cover. Three times they were caught and lined up by the communists to be shot. Each time the physicians and nurses were pulled out of line and were spared because of their talent. The others were machine gunned to death. Soon after each capture they would escape and keep making their way to the south. No shoes, no coats, very little to no food. Eventually, they were picked up by the U.S. Army. During this time he met up with the Chief of Surgery from the University of Minnesota. He asked him to look him up if he got out of Korea. Long story short—He did, and he became a thoracic vascular surgeon. His wife became a Pharmacist and they started a family. They worked so hard that they rarely had any time for family. But, he told he one day, “The only way to succeed in anything is to work when others, play, sleep, or party.” I’ve taken that to heart and it has worked. I have never, since I heard the story and what it takes to be great, have I looked at party time as an entitlement.

Bottom Line: In bodybuilding we don’t go to the gym to socialize, or to admire others. We are there to prepare to win. We dare not allow others to steal our workout time with idle chatter. Be about your business. Others will not be working and this difference is what sets us apart from the normal people of mediocrity. Work when they don’t and succeeding will belong to us.

What are you/I willing to sacrifice to win? Be careful of the answer….It might be too big but you must decide our willingness to pay the price.

As it says in Proverbs 24: 33-34:

33 A little sleep, a little slumber,
    a little folding of the hands to rest—
³⁴ and poverty will come on you like a thief
    and scarcity like an armed man.

Keep you sword near you always

Growing up in a moderately sized city in Iowa I had tons of adversaries because I was small. I was constantly fighting from the time I was nine years old until I left high school. I played all the sports I backed down from nobody and sometimes I was just dumb enough to walk right into the line of fire and get myself hurt. The big lesson is this! When you begin to fear other people is when you become a coward. You can’t bring your best game if all you’re thinking about is losing.

As we grow up we have heroes. We program ourselves to think that our heroes are gods. Then one day you’re playing alongside them. You’re carrying your own workload. They respect and admire your efforts. But it took an awful lot of ourselves to get into that position. Earning this position on the football team, on the baseball team, on the track team, is only the beginning for all of us to realize that being equal does not mean that you’ve arrived at the mountaintop.

A good illustration of this from my life was when I got to college and several of the players on the football team were my rivals in high school. They were all great athletes. I had a particular position as a placekicker. I had work overtime to get that job as a placekicker. I was instantly on the same plain as my old rivals.

In bodybuilding I saw guys in divisions above me that looked great. I wanted so much to look like them. Several years later after a lot of training I was on the same stage as some of these guys that I saw earlier. They no longer were just heroes or idols. I now have a unique privilege of competing against them as a rival. In fact it happened over again as I competed. The big payday for me was the respect I gained from people I admire.

The biggest take away from all this is that we have to never see ourselves as “wanna be’s”—The reality is that we just haven’t arrived yet and those ahead of us can be overtaken and this, in and of itself, is the trophy. The new reality for us is that we have become that which we seek….There is no place else to go and there is nothing else to win. You or I have nothing more to prove to anyone.

Bottom Line: Never look back. If you do you will be overtaken. If you look only ahead you will see what you are going to overtake. The vision is to be the same as our heroes!

Somebody once said that when you set out to accomplish something you should front load and over load the process with “PREPARATION.” In short, over “prepare” for everything and then performance is easy and predictable. All of us can attest to this fact—ALL THINGS ARE BETTER WHEN WE TAKE THE TIME TO PREPARE.

Another way to look at this paradigm is found in final part of the quote, “…“BUT ONLY CHAMPIONS HAVE THE DESIRE TO PREPARE.” Think about it…..Just because I say I want to win means that I instantly am a winner. Nor does it mean that if I just show up at the arena good things will happen. We understand that PREPARATION is essential. I used to say that I practiced posing until I got it right. My coach, Justin Dees used to say, “No! You practice until you cannot get it wrong.” This perspective is the APEX of practice. Each and every detail before the show or the game or whatever the challenge has to be as perfect as we can get it. Mistakes cannot be allowed and we leave nothing in our PREP to chance.

We have got to see PREPARATION as not just a necessity, but also something we look forward to because the PREP defines us even before we present ourselves to the stage. It’s here that we “JUST DO OUR JOBS, and because we have labored and loved the PREP we can fully enjoy the challenge and, God willing, we can win.

Bottom Line: Preparation is KING. Execution is the place we can do some sky writing. So! PREPARATION is the foreplay to the main event. Desire it and win.

Sometimes we need a safe place to make our vows. All of us has a “secret place” where all of life’s challenges are hashed out with no audience. When we were kids it could be as simple as going to our rooms to mull over a decision. To be sad, to be in the argument alone until we decide. As we have gotten older that quiet place has shifted out of necessity for greater privacy our of sight and insulated from any self talk and groaning that will accompany our personal wrestling match.

Probably, the most sacred place to be alone is when we are introduced to our other self . That person that refuses to be placed on the sidelines when times get tough. This place could be a country road, a grove of trees, the shore of a nearby pond or lake, but it must be private. The ultimate decision all of us must face is to ‘NEVER GIVE UP!” There are hundreds of moments when things don’t go very well and we hurt more than we thought we could ever endure. We have to stop, get alone and decide to ‘NEVER ALLOW OURSELVES TO GIVE UP AND TO BE FORGOTTEN.”

I know that in bodybuilding we are constantly comparing our bodies with others in the gym and in public but mostly on stage. I have personally experienced being crushed by the competition. I go home and I wrestle with whether I want to go back for a second helping of personal defeat and public humiliation. I take my own medicine and retreat to our balcony off our bedroom. I stay there until I get a clear path forward. The process is slow, painful, and ugly. But once I have decided to not give up– – –I don’t! I say, “This sh— is never going to happen again. “ From here I plan and I assess my damage and I set about the tasks to correct deficiencies and to build on my strengths. This time when I decide to not give up, I leave nothing to chance.

Each of us has the capacity to overcome defeat, self-doubt, and self inflicted annihilation. All we have to do is decide that we are not to going to give up. Giving up is tantamount to quitting. You can’t win if you stepped off the track because you gave up where you quit. This decision to not give up is one thing, failing is another thing—-but quitting is quite another.

Bottom Line: winning and failure are two sides of the same coin. But when you quit or give up you have surrendered yourself to a world that is laced with the regret.

My Final bit of advice is when you feel like quitting,—- get alone and be certain you come on that room determined tot NEVER EVER AGAIN!

Communication is the essence of life so talk to yourself like a winner and not a quitter!