Category: General

One of the promises I received a while ago told me that I would learn patience. It’s more like a promise that I needed to learn something about me that was deficient. At the same time I would learn patience through many life lessons. Admittedly, patience is not my calling card. However, just because something that you do not possess is not attainable if it’s needed. It all boils down to ‘how much you want it.’ One of my biggest frustrations/deficiencies is my pulsating impatience. I want everything “YESTERDAY”— DAMMIT! So, when I’m faced with a long wait time for something or that getting something can be had but I’ve got work long and hard for it—I’m instantly unhappy!

In bodybuilding we all face the reality that consistency, patience, persistence, drive, vision, goal setting, discipline and sometimes sheer will power will get us what we seek. Thrown all together this equals a journey that has very few fast straightaways. Just the journey propelled by the qualities mentioned and the acceptance that life regarding bodybuilding is “SO DAILY!” It’s been said that we should ‘trust the process.’ The goal and trust we accept and project is that the thing we seek will happen in it’s own time if we if we just keep going. Remember! There is nothing in our way. The world is ours to have but we have to cover the ground to get there and it’s never fast. Preparing for the stage is a remarkable endeavor. We are so motivated that we can smell the atmosphere in the arena, we can feel the energy. Then, as we lock in, we begin to understand that all we seek will come if we do not quit. We want the results….My new advice is to trust the process and all that we seek will appear. This is when we SEIZE the moment and go for the win. It is here and we have worked and waited for it and now it’s ours. The right time is NOW!

Bottom Line: Do not quit! All we need and want will come to us at the right time. Stop trying to bend time and reality. Push the limits of now so that perfection will be ushered in at the perfect time. Our job is to be patient, work hard, and don’t miss the moment when all things arrive, “RIGHT ON TIME!”

Now! This is a basic, but tall order! Life teaches us a couple of things that are foundational to getting what we want and being able to keep it. First, there can be no backing down when you are pursuing your prize. Second, there can be no compromise in the journey as we seek to keep the prize as our very own. These are immutable and immovable principles. However, in the course of doing it all right we sometimes forget what we are all about and why we possess what we have to keep. I can only say, having had this happen to me that the price you pay for inattention to the things you love is epic and sometimes self-destructive. But, I’m here to say that there is life on the other side of loss. You really can “start again” with the same vigor and commitment to never quitting—-ever again!

I believe that in bodybuilding, when we get totally destroyed on stage, we can mutter the words, “never again!” Mean it! and do something about it. Better, coaching, better diet, harder and better focused training. All these items can bring about a sense of purpose that directs us to say, “I WILL NEVER QUIT NO MATTER HOW HARD IT GETS!” My hard line philosophy is that you can be defeated, you can get tired, but you “CAN NEVER QUIT”. Quitting simply means that we have checked out of life. We have said, I am going to settle for something less because it has less pain, less effort, and it is easier. I got killed the last time I competed. So, I looked at my wife and said, “never again.” I was not ready and it showed…..never again!

Bottom Line: If you want to gain the woman of your life, if you want to progress and be a winner, you must develop the spirit of “NEVER QUIT”—NO MATTER HOW HARD IT GETS.” Always remember too that perseverance is all we have in this world. Use it!

Gone are the days of being just sixteen and all we see is within week or two of getting. All we have to do is make some strategic, ego driven adjustments in our behavior or our training and we are there. All we had in those days was youth “Piss and Vinegar” and some raw determination and we could win. Result was a swollen ego and a false sense importance. As we have gotten older we realize that anything worth having and keeping takes immense amounts of time and attention to detail. A great example is the love for our wives. It has taken our entire being to shape ourselves into the person that she loves and that we possess. There was no 2nd rate effort.

In bodybuilding, we want it all “NOW” and there is no time for waiting…That’s how we approach the game and the sport. We conclude that if I work hard. and get very sore we ought to see the magnificent changes that are promised. But, we all know that’s not the way it works. However, there are variou people that really can make gains rapidly and they will show you and they will tell you how they did it and how it’s done. They preen about with their new found trophy bodies. Then, just like “the swallows returning to Capistrano” these same people stop because they are confronted with the reality that in order to be great, you have to bury your ego and set your heart on a much higher plain. Effort that was never needed before is no required to get to the next level. Many new and different lesson must be faced and overcome to be better. These new and enduring truths will for the foundation of the character of the seeker of the best. There are no substitutes for sheer effort and the application of new found wisdom.

Let’s not belabor the backbone of this review. 1.) When it’s early or fast we only get a buzz from our ego. 2.) When it’s long, hard, focused, and it consumes all of our lessons learned, our Character is more soundly fixed within our person.

Bottom Line: If you want to be better, then do not be fooled by your own ego which deludes our self worth. Instead, “do the work” and a total package of the better you will emerge because your wisdom and character has carried you to this great place of honor.

Choose anything that you want as part of your existence and you will discover that it must be desired, it must be lusted after, it must capture our imagination, you have to reach deep to get it. For us guys, there is a woman that attracts us from the four winds. Nothing we do allows the thought of her to left out. All we think about is having her with us always. The irony in this is that someone as lovely as her will require Herculean effort to have, protect, possess, and to keep forever. This is the way of permanence.

Reflecting on our bodybuilding journey, there is nothing that comes easy. Sometimes we run across athletes that seem to have all the gifts and tools to be super stars. Yet, these athletes often take their natural gifts for granted, they win easily, the enjoy ONLY the applause and admiration of mere mortals with little to no effort. But they, like us learn that victory and fame are short lived. What has to fill this void after the contest or immediate challenge is the thing that will have real staying power. That thing that will provide companionship, reassurance that we are going in the right direction. I would submit that the reward for effort is our health, greater self esteem, and a desire to show others how to get what we have. There isn’t a satisfaction quite as great as watching another person reach for their own dreams because of our help. There is a verse in the New Testament that I ascribe to, “

2 Timothy 2:2  “And the things that thou hast heard of me among many witnesses, the same commit thou to faithful men, who shall be able to teach others also.”

What’s the point of learning a life skill if you can’t pass it along to others? The things that we struggle to make last in our lives are certainly worth passing along.

Bottom line: Decide what is worth keeping forever because they will last and tell others how to get it to….and WHY!

I like the quote from Russell M. Nelson, President of the LDS Church when his first wife died suddenly. He said “God gave this tragedy to him because God knew he could take it.” I’d like to submit that we have to be able to see ourselves as perfectly capable of having what it takes to live our lives just as it has been presented to us. We have to believe that we are strong and virile and and determined enough to get out of bed each morning and put on our battle gear and face the world and win. What good is it to play “not to lose?” What if we saw each day as an opportunity to only avoid pain and defeat and then if we made it to supper time we chalk it up as a victory or a win? I think none of us would want to even wake up let alone get out of bed.

In bodybuilding it has been said, “I don’t stop when I’m tired. I stop when I’m done!” Each workout is a microcosm of how we approach our lives. Training is just that—training! We train our minds, our bodies, our heart to be something better. In the process, we learn that life is not getting any easier, it’s that we are getting stronger. We have to see ourselves in the light of carrying out a divine calling and purpose and that God will provide the strength to do it. But, this does not release us from the personal responsibility to take care of the training and strengthening of our person to be able to live this life.

There is a winner’s circle or moment on stage for us muscle heads where all of our efforts are rewarded with a medal or a trophy. These things symbolize our efforts even though they are just hunks of meaningless medal. As in life, gaining something because of our strength does not equal perfection. All of us would attest to our personal inadequacies. However! Being imperfect does not mean we are helpless. We have to seize our strength to be the best we can be despite the challenges we face daily.

Bottom Line: Nobody is perfect but we all have the responsibility to improve so what we possess can be shared with others. There is no substitute to the strengthening of all we have to be better than we are.

Get started. Make sure our competitors know that we are coming for them. Let those we love know that we are strong enough to win and to protect them. There are no other lessons!

Do you recall the first time that somebody told you to “stop looking around and—FOCUS?” Usually, in most situations it was a parent, a teacher, a coach, or maybe an attentive friend. This bit of wisdom is probably one of the best pieces of advice we have are gotten in our lives. Most of us relegated the advice to a one time lesson that seemed to work. But, as fate or life would have it, we discovered that whenever we truly wanted something it required focus. Unwavering attention on what we are doing gets us what we want. Now, let’s open our minds a bit. It says in Proverbs, “Where there is no VISION the people perish!” We have to do better than focus on our daily needs to establish the calling or vector for our lives. We have to know what we are all about. We have to know where we want to be and we have to have some way or plan to get to where we want to be. Most of us are very good about accomplishing daily tasks, but damn few of us ever take the time to see beyond today to where we want to go. At first, we see only “shapes in the fog” as we try to envision what we want. Then, as we embark on pursuing our passion, things are clarified. The “shapes in the fog” take on real, discernible forms that help us define ourselves in relation to our goals. Also, note that as we spend time penciling in our ‘Life’s Vision” we become less afraid of it. A vision need not destroy what you have. In fact, all fear disappears as we see what others can’t see, as we set out plans to follow our visions, and finally as we break into a sprint to get there.

Nothing can stop us now! Bring your vision out of the recesses of your mind and take them “to the stage to win!” Somebody will always try to dissuade you from your path. Give them no thought. Be fearless and embrace your journey to the winner’s circle and as a bodybuilder the trophy that represents you, your vision, your hard work, and your win.

Bottom Line: Be about the business of defining your vision and being so focused that any and every fear pales. Go for it! This is your life and it is your time…..Don’t let imagined fear steal your passion or you “VISION!”

If you want to win or to gain or to possess something there will be pain. Factoid of life! Nothing is free so stop pretending that something worth having is going to be given to you with little to no effort or cost. In the gym you have to understand that you have to push yourself a little more to get a little more. When you get to the pre-decided number or reps or sets you have to reach inside your mind to go further or longer. It all starts in the mind. This extra effort will result in a little better result. We all think that when it hurts or we are tired this is the stopping point……Not so! We go just a harder and exert more effort. However, I am of the opinion that each incremental increase is small. We dare not do too much too soon or we will suffer the inevitable consequence of injury. When we were younger we could do giant leaps forward with large increases in weight and we may or may not suffer much. When we are older each increase is tempered by hard fought for wisdom. We will get there….but slowly….!! We push hard and we don’t give in to simple discomfort. There’s a great saying I picked up this past year, “I don’t stop when I’m tired, I stop when I’m done!” Set the goal and do it all. Spend the extra time and don’t be in a hurry.

Maybe, the pain we are trying to overcome is “baked into the cake” from the beginning. The moment we decided something, or someone is worth it, the pain required to get what we want is “IRRELEVANT.” The pain to overcome on our way to attaining that which we want is purely incidental. Gaining what we want negates any pain and the memory of the pain is erased. When we were kids and we were highly motivated to get onto the baseball field with our buddies we didn’t think twice about getting hurt or over exerting ourselves. We did it. When we wanted to see a new girlfriend who lived too far away, we jumped on our bikes and pushed ourselves to make the trek to her house. Nothing phased us and nothing stopped us. Pain? What pain? So it is when we want something badly enough…..Pain, in this case does not have to be overcome…..It has been rendered IRRELEVANT because the goal is worth it.

Bottom Line: If what we want has been determined to be worth it, the pain the get it is incidental and never even taken into consideration enroute to winning. So, finish the course!

Presently, I have been pressing very hard for my goal in my business to materialize. I’ve worked, worried, sweat, gone beyond the normal day’s work, I’ve prayed, I’ve talked about it, I’ve planned, and the expected results continues to evade me. I have seriously wondered if what I am seeking is worth it. The pain of seeming failure or the feeling that maybe my goal is so big it is unattainable. Time, and the psychological frustration all contribute to the willingness to settle. Yes! I’ve been ALONE, BROKE, TIRED AND SCARED ALL AT ONCE. But, the shorter term goal is to never give in and to get up every day and resume the pursuit.

Also, during this time, I have decided to continue doing bodybuilding because it engages me and makes me face myself and choose to go on. Training keeps me sharp and it has taught me tons of little lessons I needed to learn to be on track and ever moving forward. My training is leading toward another major contest appearance despite carrying this elephant on my shoulders. It keeps me honest. I believe because of training that I can endure anything…..I believe I cannot be beaten!

In the gym my goals in business and in bodybuilding involve hours of training, planning, praying, pushing while I’m ALONE. I’ve been BROKE to the point that competing must be put off until I have enough money to move to the stage. I worry and work so hard that I am eternally TIRED. I sleep in the middle of the day. Sometimes, I fall asleep at traffic lights. I’m afraid or SCARED that I will fail. In each of these states I have to KEEP GOING because I never made a “PLAN B”….I am an all or nothing sort of guy. I have to experience all of these things and yet go beyond them. Settling for less is NEVER and option. We only have today! Never stop chasing your goals. If any one of these things threatens to overtake you and cause you to quit….Go get some counseling from a great friend or your coach. No matter what…..Keep going! As the old saying goes, “Why go half way across the lake, get scared and then go back to the original side you started from.?” Finish strong! Like the Apostle Paul says, “I have fought a good fight, I have kept the faith, henceforth there is laid up for me a crown of righteousness which the Lord, the Righteous shall give me…..” Go get the goal. Nobody ever said it would be easy but they did tell you it would be worth it!

Bottom Line: Finish what you started. Amen! and Amen! Nobody can ever take your accomplished goal away from you.

Let’s face it! Winners are made from the earth from which the have sprung. The environment that nurtures the winners is the crucible that teaches them the feelings of failure and the rebound emotion to never fail at something again. Like somebody said, somewhere in my past, “in order to get back to the surface, you have to push hard off the bottom.” Being at our lowest point is not a resting place. It is a starting place! We correct our position by pushing off the bottom and overcoming the depth of our fall, the water’s resistance, and we keep our eyes on the surface as we ascend. Failing is part of winning because it teaches us why we failed in the first place, what needs to be done to insure that it never happens again, and what we can do differently from this point forward.

I recall when I first met my bodybuilding coach, Justin Dees. I was transfixed by the size of the great bodybuilders that I began to come in contact with. I weighed about 176 lbs at the time. I told Justin that I wanted to get as big as possible. Justin smiled wryly and said, “Let’s go!, If you want to be big here’s what we are going to do? He started me on a diet with over 7,000 Calories in it. He had me lifting as hard as I could. My cheat meals were immense. After about 3 months my weight was 210 lbs and I was fat! My muscles grew to gigantic proportions for my small frame but they were covered with tons of fat. My poor wife was trying to accommodate my newly gained dimensions with clothes that were suddenly available only from “OMAR THE TENT MAKER.” One day justin smiled at me smugly and said, “are we done yet?” Hard lesson for me! Listen to your coach and put away idiotic ideas. Since then I competed between 176 lbs. and 195 lbs. and have won several times and I just finished my 21st show a year ago. Side notes for learning: During this time I developed high blood pressure, reflux esophagitis, sleep apnea. — Listen to your coach. But, the lessons were not wasted. They propelled me forward in ways I could not have imagined.

There’s an old saying, “I never lose. If I’m not winning, I’m learning!” None of us are losers if we learn from our mistakes and our failures.

Bottom Line: Win, lose, or draw. The time spent and the lessons learned are etched into your mind and character forever. But “Do” try to never repeat a mistake…If you repeat a mistake it only means that you learned nothing from the first failure.

We are the guardians our lives, our souls, and our being. God has given each of us a little gift that He will never violate. The name of this little gift is “AGENCY”—-Which is our ability to choose. That doesn’t mean that God is a hands off being, quite the contrary. But, each of us has the capacity and the choice to do those things that are right. To not choose what is right is to default to that which is wrong—-and we intuitively know it.

We have to choose to put ourselves on our “TO DO LIST” or we will forget about us or we will simply neglect the gifts that we possess and succumb to the items that will destroy us.

In the world of bodybuilding we leave nothing to chance as we push to be better. We place our effort at the top of all we do. Ask any of our colleagues and fellow muscle heads what happens when we try to fly by the seat of our pants or to allow our egos to comfort us instead of pouring on the effort. I think it can be summarized as we, “crash and burn” in the most humiliating way. If we are going to compete in life or in bodybuilding we have to make us the PRIORITY by exercising our AGENCY and putting ourselves at the top of our list of “THINGS TO DO” and victories to be had. Each of us has had the terrible experience of watching great talent go unused, abused, and eventually destroyed by sheer neglect. I just happen to believe that each of us has a mighty spirit that longs to be developed and turned loose. So, choose to leave today behind and push on to something far better than you are today.

I keep coming back to an old quote by my great friend Doug Andrewski who said to me when I was lamenting not getting started in bodybuilding much sooner in life, “ALL WE HAVE IS TODAY AND YOU HAVE A TON OF POTENTIAL!” I was instantly humbled by the realization that I was focusing on the wrong thing…..Ouch! We are where we are. Now choose to be better by BECOMING A PRIORITY IN MY LIFE!.…Nobody else can do it for me…..I must decide that I am the only one that can “exercise my own agency for me. I must not allow inattention to myself to be my undoing.

Bottom Line: Decide to be important to yourself. It’s your “to do list” so put yourself at. the top and go win.