This is a tough sell to most of us because we have been raised to never draw attention to ourselves. We must be humble and never boastful of the skills and gifts we possess. So, we “hide our light under a bushel basket” rather than “letting our light so shine before men.” However, we have to balance this idea of humility against knowing that we are up to the task at hand. We have to have a significant degree of self-confidence in order to even step onto the field of contest. The decision we face is whether we will see ourselves as winners or just passive observers. It is essential for us to believe that we are significant and able to compete in this thing called life.
MY BEGINNINGS
I grew up in a very large family of 10 kids in Iowa. We were very poor and everybody in our small town new we were poor and not very good. They said things like, “They are Grahams. We know your family and we think you are low lifes and dirty. Get lost.” We were the butts of many jokes about our clothes or our station is life. I hated that existence and I was constantly in fights and competing like a demon on the sports fields.
When I was a boy around 10 years old I learned some very hard lessons about what its going to take to be respected. The first maxim is that nobody is going to change my circumstances in life except me. If I want anything I am going to have to work very hard to get it. The second maxim is that you cannot trust anyone to be your friend all the time, especially when you needed a friend. Thirdly, it does not matter what the currency is that I competed for that brought me respect. I only knew that I wanted my share.
ACCOMPLISHMENT LEADS TO RESPECT
From this point on I played every sport available to me. Baseball, Football, Wrestling, Track and I lifted some weights to get stronger. I would work hard in the alley out back of my house doing 50 yard sprints over and over again to get faster and to win at track. I would take extra batting practice. I would practice kicking off and kicking extra points in the hot summer sun at our local football field. Anything I did I did it 100% with the belief that I could do it and win. Needless to say I excelled at almost anything I put my mind to. This time in my life became the template, the confidence crucible that I needed to develop for the rest of my life. My life has been full and there are rare exceptions/failures to my experience.
So what’s next? As I continue my journey as a bodybuilder this late in life I am forever astonished at the number of other men (young and old) who seek my advice on how to get better. This happens no less than 5 times each day in the gym. Guys and sometimes girls will come over to me and ask me a question about diet, weight lifting techniques, and sometimes just to talk. These conversations and the dispensing of tips and advice has led me to know that I have been prepared for a much higher calling than just self respect and accomplishment. Others need my (our) help to be able to see their goals through, or to get back on track in some area of their lives.
ULTIMATELY WE ARE SERVANTS
When I focus on others while I tread this training path I find that many in our circle are going through things that are dreadful, dangerous, and daunting. A simple, “How’s it going?” can sometimes lead to a much needed exchange that allows me to help them. This too has happened multiple times. In short, serving others is the ultimate pinnacle of our life’s trek. There is always somebody else who is struggling with things far beyond bodybuilding. Some problems are life defining and I’ve had the privilege of being there to help. Service above self is the best measure of a self-confident life.
In closing, please know that each of us has a personal responsibility to learn belief in ourselves so that we can teach others also, that they too can have a life worth living. Progress is not an option. It is a requirement. So believe in yourself so that we will be prepared to help others believe in themselves. Thus, we have life.
Six Pack and Senior 